“How poor are they that have not patience! What wound did ever heal but by degrees?”
I’ve never been one to have much patience. I blame technology. Everything is available at the click of a button, these days. When it comes to matters of health or even the human spirit though, the option to heal at the click of a button isn’t really an option. It takes time. I’m dealing with both at the moment. My posts are reflecting how I feel. Even inworld, I struggle. I’ve mentioned chronic pain in previous posts. I stopped taking medication to control the pain. As a result, my mood has not been great. I’m also dealing with other things at the moment. I’m asking residents just to be a little patient with me.
In the next few weeks, there is a chance of surgery. So I may end up taking a short break from the virtual world to heal those parts of me that are hurting. Fear not though loyal readers, when that day comes, I’ll let you all know. The recovery time is extensive so I have no idea how long my absence will entail. BUT, this will heal me and take care of that pesky pain, which I’ve dealt with for almost two years now. I’m hoping for approval right now from doctors.
In addition to health, I’m not sure that my time in second life will ever be the same. I’m not sure, if I’ll ever be the same again. I need patience inworld and in my real life at the moment. It’s not the easiest. I’m struggling with all my worlds. So maybe that break to heal my broken body will also help a cracked heart too.
Meanwhile I’ve been watching a show to help with some of that down time. I linked an episode of Steven Universe that reminded me to go through the motions of my feelings. A dear friend got me hooked. I have to find my happy to be okay–especially with surgery. Recovery is long and painful. There’s also a lot of work to be done afterwards. But I know this will give me some quality of life back. I also need time to heal from sl stuff too. I’ll figure out how to heal eventually. Okay enough talk about all of that……onto the picture at hand.
Now, I want to talk a little bit about my outfit. I went shopping with my shopping buddy Kira. We both found this wonderful outfit from Villena called a lace up skirt and V top. There are many options available. You can find it at this month’s Uber. I have to say this round is excellent, so it may require a little patience to get there. It’s worth it though. For more styling info see the credits below.
Be kind to one another and I’ll try to do the same.
I’ll be around 🙂
Lace up skirt–Villena by Kambi (villena.swansen)
V Neck Top–Villena by Kambi (villena.swansen)
Hair–Rowne –Salon Sanna Hair by Fashionboi Landar
*My picture seems to be having issues. I’ll try to fix it later.
I really hope that everyone is having a good start to spring. It’s one of my favorite times of the year, because I know summer and warmer temperatures are right around the corner. I could use a bit of both. I hope others are planning fun things for sunnier days. I know these past few weeks haven’t been the happiest on my flickr–or even in my blogs. I haven’t been in a good place, so I returned to real life. I reminded myself of all the things that are the most important to me. I think that’s important. Virtual worlds are wonderful, but there are times when things can become difficult. There is something to be said for a good meal in a restaurant and a day of walking around.
I thought a lot about my time in this big/little virtual world. I made a home here in a way. The friends have left impressions on me. I have left impressions on them too–sometimes good, sometimes bad. I am deliciously imperfect and full of flaws. I’m not saintly. I’m not perfect. I’m full of folly–like most people. I’ll be the first to admit it. Once, I had a very dear friend of mine in real life who told me every person you meet battles demons. Both her parents have now passed from alcoholism….way before their time–and no she is not an sl resident–just a very dear rl friend. She taught me a lot about mistakes, going through dark moments, redemption, and finding the light in every special moment that graces your history. I’ve been so incredibly lucky that my sl story had good friends surrounding me, in my most darkest and vulnerable of moments. I’m even luckier to know people in my real life who have guided me through some tough things also.
I think about time, because I grapple with it. How I spend it? Where I spend it? Who I spend it with. And what it means to me. I don’t value time the way that I should. I don’t even come close. I’m spending my whole life learning how to respect–myself and other people–which takes…time. It all comes down to time in real life and second life. How we spend it defines who we become. Our friends become reflections of us. Our goals are shaped by what we do. I always say time is precious. It really is. It took me a lot of thought this week to realize that I don’t regret the relationships that I’ve made in any way. Each person who has crossed my path has taught me something by giving me their time–both good and bad…..and everything in between.
Whew, okay those are my heavy thoughts. Now onto the important stuff, I stopped by the skin fair and changed up my skin a bit, but I stuck with DeeTalez. I love their skin. I also found this wonderful lingerie by Erratic at this month’s Collabor 88. You may have to hurry though. The end of the month is nearing and the next round is right around the corner.
Before I end this…. I want people to know one thing. Your darkest moments never define you. You are more than your worst day–in all worlds. Thank you to my real life friend for reminding me that I am more…so much more than a few bad days. Thank you to the residents who touch my life as well.
Be kind to one another and I’ll try to learn to do that more each day too. 🙂
Head–LeLutka –Simone by Jaden Art (jadenart)
Body–Maitreya –Lara by Onyx LeShelle
Ears–Mandala –Simple Ears by 菊之介王子 (kikunosuke.eel)
Nails–arcade–Spooky Salon–Thirst–at the arcade this month
Hair–Clawtooth –Giselle by Bubbles Clawtooth
Lingerie–Erratic –Priscilla by erratic (erratic.rain)
Eyes–IKON–Charm Eyes by Ikon Innovia
Skin–DeeTalez –Claudia by deetalez.com (steffi.villota)
“Nothing can make injustice just but mercy.” Robert Frost
I love Robert Frost. He’s my favorite poet. I remember reading his poems on the coldest days. They always gave me a bit of hope. Even today, I find his words hopeful. Sometimes everyone needs a bit of hope and mercy in life. There’s that line of needing a break. If you ever get that small tiny break, you should embrace it and cherish it. They don’t always happen. Also never forget those who give you a break in the end and show you a bit of mercy, because they may just hope that you do the same for them in return.
A long time ago, I had a resident tell me that everyone at some point everyone contemplates leaving second life. People take breaks. People come back. People leave. I am not alone in this. After 3 years, I did just that….contemplate leaving seriously for about a week. Some would think it was due to not handling a stressful situation. However, it wasn’t. When my mental health falters and I reach a breaking point, I have every right to step away or quit–when or if I deem necessary–without explanation. Now that being said, I did not walk away. I took care of myself in my real life. I continue to do so. I felt misunderstood, judged, and criticized. Then, I also had real life events happen and I was ready to wave the white flag and just quit to take care of myself.
In the end, I felt down. Even if some things were true, it’s never an easy thing to hear. I’m still recovering from just living life, last week. I’m sure there will be a more up beat blog on the horizon. Everyone goes through difficult periods in their life–this is mine. I’ve been shown mercy, which made me hopeful that things would get better.
Thanks for sticking with me. Despite all of that, there are some wonderful events on the grid–the arcade, collabor88, and the skin fair is soon to open. I spent some time at the arcade with a friend of mine. I was able to find this wonderful outfit. For styling information, please see my credits below.
Hair–LeLutka –Adrianna by Thora Charron
Top–CX–The Iron Maiden by Cᴇʀʙᴇʀᴜs (kamayari)
Panty–CX–The Iron Maiden by Cᴇʀʙᴇʀᴜs (kamayari)
Corset–CX–The Iron Maiden by Cᴇʀʙᴇʀᴜs (kamayari)
Gloves–CX–The Iron Maiden Rare by Cᴇʀʙᴇʀᴜs (kamayari)